NO STARS EVER!!!!!!!!
Rated R for violence, gore and language.
86 Minutes
Directed By: Colin Strause and Greg Strause
Written By: Shane Salerno
Staring: Steven Pasquale, Johnny Lewis, John Ortiz, Reiko Aylesworth, and Ariel Gade
Synopsis
Warring alien and predator races descend on a small town, where unsuspecting residents must band together for any chance of survival.
Review
Here’s the plan: Let’s make a rip off of a rip off! At least AVP gave the Aliens and Predator series some respect, this movie pooed all over everything that made Aliens and Predator cool and ignored it. Some of the best Science-Ficiton/Horror films ever have been violated with incompetent sequels. Terminator 3 is a terrible sequel, but a fun stand alone movie. Heck, even the show, The Sarah Connor Chronicles essentially dismissed the nonsense of the movie and relied on the mythology of the two original films done by James Cameron. Alien 4: Resurrection, was not a great sequel, but again at least a reasonable stand alone film implementing characters we love and taking some of what we loved about the series (James Cameron did Aliens, plus Ridley Scott on Alien) and using that for a superficial version to the series. Predator 1 and 2 has some of the best science fiction and horror elements in film ever. So to take the nerds idea from the end of Predator two and make a video game out of it is a cool idea. To make a movie without any conviction is another entirely.
In AVP there was a least a plot that carried the same eerie feel of being alone in the jungle or lost in space, by being stuck in the remoteness of Antarctica. There was room for a sound plot, but it was never fully developed. There was too little time spent on characters or story and everything jumped directly into the action. The action was entertaining. We got to enjoy the gratuitous massacre of Aliens killing Predators and Predators killing Aliens. It was mindless, but at least some respect was paid to what made the movie even possible in the first place. The ending went all wrong and got carried away, but in general it was not a complete disaster of a film.
Two paragraphs later I’ve described a half dozen mediocre films and sequels that were all below par, but they were all Oscar worthy next to AVPR. The non-existent plot is barely even discussable. The aliens escape from a ship and start killing people in a remote town, except they are being led by this hybrid alien/predator and then everything turns into a zombie flick gone horribly wrong, except the campy fun in zombie movies is missing, and all the things that were wicked cool about the Predator and Aliens is gone. The only thing that remains is a shell of some of the most amazing fictional antagonists of all time. There was no forethought, and no love put into this movie, it was thrown together, a stamp was put on it, and before they even cared what the end results were they put it in theatres.
I can get behind campy, silly, bad science fiction movies, but when you violate something as terribly as the Alien and Predator series has been here, it goes far past offensive and makes me wonder if there is any integrity in the film world anymore. I have more tolerance for a by the numbers mushy gushy chick flick staring Mandy Moore, my movie kryptonite, than I have for a movie that is so pathetic as this one. I feel like having a memorial service for the Alien and Predator series, I’m so terribly dejected.
I don’t believe Colin and Greg Strause ever saw an Alien or Predator movie before they agreed to direct this film as a duo. This may not have been the worst movie I have ever seen, but it is certainly the worst disservice I have ever seen done to such a substantial group of movies. If you liked Aliens or Predator or even AVP I’m certain this movie will piss you off. If you haven’t and never had love for those series, this may only be a moderately bad movie in your book. In my mind it’s the worst kind of nightmare, the kind that lingers on DVD racks across America, and will always remain, but tragically not forgotten.
I didn’t think this was that bad. There was some cool action and awesome killings. It was a cool action movie.
You are absolutely correct. I cant believe people are saying this movie is good in any way, shape or form. Its a nightmare. Makes me sick to the pit of my stomach.